Overthinking it all

these posts latley have just been crazy out pours… just emotion turmoil from my day at work – which sucks the most. I think today I am okay and realize – I will be okay – well I already knew this – but I had to be mad and upset and sad – to be happy. I am almost there. Well at least for now I am almost there…

Justin’s death and that grief is at the center of this all… and everything else around it just makes it harder.Trying to hold onto her was just a mechanism to deal with this grief and pain to not feel so low… and kinda losing that just really hurt and does hurt. Mixed feelings – all over the place thought – in the end really irrelevant – but it feels good getting it out. I could dwell on it and keep going on and on – but I think I would start getting repetative – I could say a lot more and ant too but would over do it – and might say something to off base or give the wrong impression. I don’t want that.

So I think I will wrap up my thoughts on … the recent topics with  one more post. The one after this – then I hopefully, will change gears and get to thinking of other things.

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