So ive been thinking

 

What the hell is the point of posting any of our writing on any site ever? If you truly have talent do you not wish to be published? I know I DO. so I ask fellow writers, just what is the point if by posting works online, we devalue them? They say posting to a blog or online makes our works worthless and anything submitted online may never be published in a book? so why then give away our gems?

What do you think? can we still succeed and be known if we give away our work for free? 

i myself write alot of stuff i think is great work but post it online… and thus… what does that mean? can i still try to get it published? some say no… hmmm what to post then? i wanna share my work… 

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If I could stand before you.

and for all the running…

from the enemy…

all the deaths and sorrow that has accumulated

… will be for something.

sacrifices will not have been in vain.

hard choices, even poor choices – 

lead to a better path

a better life!

We will succeed! 

And push past this moment,

this strife, this lull, this dull, boring state,

will evaporate. Believe soon, that the tides will turn

the drought will end, immaturity will become maturity

and we shall catch up. We shall make amends for time lost.

This is not the end or the middle, but perhaps, still the beginning.

For our dreams are grand; our visions everlasting,

we cannot go out without a fight, 

we WILL NOT go out without a fight.

So heres to another day, another day on which hope

may be found; a future to live for, and a love,

to share to it with.

Cheers. 

 

Ron Bergquist

Jan 11th 12:30 am

 

Now and Then

it hurts now.
It hurts thinking back.

You’re not here anymore
not mine anymore.

The lies in the end
reflect the lies in the beginning.

That is why I cannot go on
that is why we’ve fallen apart.

I don’t know what to feel
or think or say or even do.

I feel like I want nothing to do with you.
Just let time pass and maybe one day

We can maybe be friends
we can start over.

Just not while the past is so fresh
replaying in my mind.

Our fights and arguments
and all the time I fought with you over other guys.

thats what hurts the most;
I feel like you were never truly mine.

Like I never fully understood you;
as if I wasn’t good enough.

I just want to forget
the things Im rememebring.

None of it seems real.
because you lied.

Ron Bergquist
January 7th 2013

Happy new year – a goodbye to last year: a rembrance of things past.

Well… happy new year… so lets see going to spit out the details chronologically but just the gist so here it is.

This Christmas was a kick back to everything retro. Just doing what I used to do and love. I got into Edmonton and went to church with my mentor. There shared in a share group. Interesting. Spent a night drinking with her and her husband. Danced and joked and told honest truths. Shared life, loved and laughed. Spent some time with my son before heading to friends. Andrews, and scott was there and as always drank with him. Laughed and played fighters. It was good.

I miss my friends back home so much. I miss Susie and her guidance. I miss church and my friends I had in church. I miss Martine… I miss being close to my son and Edmonton. My heart truly belongs there. It does. So it seems right now.

Went to the farm and met up with Sarah, hung with her a few times, she was cool. Made me realize I don’t actually love Andria, over her. I need to and want to get over her. As much as it makes me jealous that shes into Josh again. Stupid details that unraveled over my holidays. Oh well no matter, anyway right? okay. Take this is stride and go forward.

That said, the rest of my holiday consisted of some awesome days with my son. Spent a day at the water park. A few nights on the farm, went skiiing with brad. hung out at waynes and ate tongs of food.

I also got to spend Christmas eve playing kevin and alex in a game of risk, they stayed for dinner. a solid memory.

If there is anything i am disappointing in, it is that Jeff hardly talks to us, brothers…

All in all Hayden was annoying as fuck and I had a good time. though he wasnt too bad at times and yeah he kinda came out ok. buying beer and lending me a few bucks and smokes here and there… so okay for a young dude. I guess… whos a.d.d and totally off the wall. he got the best of me on the way there and the way out…

well im home now and trying to unwind and everything that was so brilliant in my head in my thoughts on the way here shall stay in my head till i ever have the time to detail all the thoughts I had when i had them… *breathes* …. so much on my mind and i am buzzed and getting drunk and just putting the gist of many frames of mind of thought down at once…

Happy new year.

I hope this following year to be the biggest and best yet. oh yess. many new things to come on all fronts. New house, new job, get my n and a car, new everything… new girl? hmm? interesting. Hahaha and oh if i move back to edmonton soon? the joys that could await there!

so stoked.