There’s that picture of you on my nightstand.
You in a Santa hat, smiling from ear to ear,
That Grin – that unique Justin grin –
That everyone came to love –
Your trade mark…
Brother, if you were here with me how happy I’d be.
The mere thought makes me weep.
Lately you’ve once again flooded my dreams…
I hugged you as you told me you missed us all.
Not as much as we miss you though,
I walk through the snow and remember
The days of the farm, us sledding in the sandpit,
The days we laughed and ran around the house –
Slid down the stairs in sleeping bags –
We amused ourselves anyways we could…
No one can replace these or erase these bonds…
No one will ever take from me the love I have for you…
I wish I knew a release from this pain – the pain of memory.
The joy we share shouldn’t make me cry when I remember you…
Memories – memories – memories –
So I play that stupid song…
And the song itself is filled with your essence,
You were the beat uplifting us all – all your friends
As you goofed off and sang silly – making us all laugh…
How simple and childish those moments were,
However now so important and so dear.
You were the life of the party,
You were the best.
I only wish I told you more, I wish I did more…
If I could have a Christmas gift, a miracle,
It’d be to see you – to tell you how important you are.
I’m selfish and I want this regret and guilt to sting a little less…
To know that I did my best as a brother to you…
Damn it! There is no one like you!
No one so pure and true!
No one spoke their heart like you
Not even I – a poet of the people,
You trumped even me…
You stumped me with simple logic-
That became profound,
As I watched you love everyone who came around.
I said boldly; to drop that friend, ignore her…
You said no man, maybe everyone hurts; in the end,
We all need a friend
Even if they stole from you, your view didn’t waver.
And I never heard you speak ill of another…
So now I dry my tears, smile as the year ends,
Remembering your love for family and friends,
As I look at that picture of you in a Santa hat,
I see a man who broke the mold and set trends,
You’ve implanted love in many hearts, that’s a fact,
And as for me – every Christmas now,
I’ll always remember your spirit –
That sweet goofy guy who blew out our candles
During Christmas church service –
As we parted and the light dimmed,
Then spoke the closing words,
Merry Christmas, be well my friend –
Be well my Friend, be well my family,
Smile big and laugh often,
You never know whose life you’ll change….
Just as Justin did.
December 23rd 2014