Con-vill

The world is a con,
Silently they come down,
You’re long gone,
A part of my frown.

The whisper in the breeze,
The doubt in the eyes,
The saucer light above the trees,
Watch me die.

Nothing matters anymore…
Nothing matters anymore…
Open Hades, open the door…

Push me over the edge,
Bring my hate to a boil,
Remember what I said…
Wrap my eyes in foil.

Chasing Shadows

I’m trying to recall the journey,
The feelings of the last 8 days,
Trying to remember why,
Trying to recall where,
It all began to unravel my mind…

Where was I headed when I started this trip?
Did I have a direction of deluion planned?
And what was driving me so hard…why?
Why did I feel the urge to escape?
I’m so tired of same boring routine,
day in and day out, combined with my stress,
Im breaking down and acting out,
Reverting back to the old barbaric me.

Who really gives a honest fuck about reality?
I’ll take my anger and burn it like jet fuel,
Launching me beyond the fringes of insanity,

By night I’ll be a mad man, peeking out the window
Analying everysound and misplaced step of the normal routine.
By morning I’ll be a spooked out bug-eyed paranoid
Trying to convince myself I’m just imagining everything

And all the voices are really just in my head…
But that still does not explain everything…
I can’t trust my own eyes and ears, even my friends
So I’ll be writing signs and waving them in the air

Just in case they really are watching me.
If it’s not all in my head then everyone including the mood and sun
Is in on it – to scare me straight…

How much of it is real?
And if I knew the truth…
Does it really matter?

After 8 long days and nights,
Ive never felt more insane.
Despite all my unanswerd questions,
I do have some answers…

Though at this time,
im not sure they really matter.
Im staring up at the light,
From the bottom of the deepest hole I’ve ever dug.

Insidious

Rising from the depths of my soul,

The madness of a thousand memories,

The repressed violent outbusrts,

Manfesting their own voice and personality,

And now theyre all screaming inside of me!
We’ve sold the lie,

For the small price

Of my sanity.

I guess my doctor was right

Ill never fit into society.
Infact I might as well play the part,

Keep in mind as you verbally judge me, 

I could easily stop holding back and let my dark side rip you apart.

Im too smart, to fall apart,

For the satisfaction of the faction of ignorant invalids

Spewing mindless shit, without batting an eyelid.
I feel my inner demons twitch and I feel the itch,

To carve you up and make the onlookers sick.

Youre too old and slow, and my minds to quick,

Ill let this slight slip, but next time you best get a grip quick,

Or else,
Or else!

Ill realease my demons and give you the reality check

A small minded, white picket fence – normal life dunce

Should get! Ill sever your ties to what you call reality,
Youll be one to regret,

One to never ever forget,

What it means to lean 

Face to face with a man,

Whos mastered mean.